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Or How My Life Changed in an Instant

To say 2019 has not been my year would be a vast understatement. This blog is to chronicle my journey from happily married to blind-sided and broken to (hopefully) whole again. And all the in-betweens.

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Trigger Warning #metoo

This memory popped up on Facebook for me again this morning. And it struck me as front and center as this movement was two years ago, we don't hear about it much anymore. I thought it a worthy reminder so I am re-posting here. And I will re-post this as often as I need to. Because #metoo is something we should always be talking about. PS - I also re-read through every. single. one of your comments from my original post. Thank you all for being so supportive and loving. ******

Mister Manfred I Presume?

We are in serious danger of this turning into a puppy blog. So our first night at home went about as expected. Meaning he cried until wearing himself out, would sleep a little, then cry some more. I think around 3 or 4am he finally decided to really sleep. It was exactly as exhausting as it sounds. Not that it was unexpected. That's the price you pay when there's a new baby in the house. Because he isn't fully potty trained, we are keeping him in my office space all day. Yest


Oh my goodness...I just realized my last blog post was my 100th post! I had thought of all the things I wanted to say if I ever made it to 100...and then I forgot to keep track. Something just made me look though so I'll share those things now. I started this blog during one of the worst times of my life. My life hasn't been all sunshine and daisies - has anyone's? In case you are new here, I'll try to do a quick recap of my life so far... I grew up poor, white trash. And don


It's surprising how busy life gets without ever leaving the house. Or rarely leaving the house. And yet time flies. I have a plethora of topics to discuss but I'd like to get political for a second. Well, I don't really want to get political, but I feel it has come to that. I've been seeing an awful lot of "I don't care who you vote for, we can still be friends" posts lately. But the more I see of those, the more I realize the vast majority of those posts are from Trump suppo

Moving On

Life's been a bit hectic lately. I started my new job - YAY! - and I am loving it. There are kinks to work out, processes to get used to, but - at least so far - everyone has been very patient and kind. Everyone is understanding of the amount of work (I went from 0 to 24 files in 24 hours. Literally.) and really helpful. I'm overwhelmed, but yet I'm not stressed because no one is yelling at me every 5 minutes. Though I do have over 100 emails in my inbox right now that I have

The Last Day

I'll admit, I'm a little nervous. I have been at my current job for almost 4 years - and that's practically an eternity in mortgage. Mortgage people have a tendency to shift around a lot. Sometimes you stay with your core group, other times you branch out for one reason or another. I have closed 485 loans here. I closed 16 loans this month already with 4 more already clear to close. And yes, I have been unhappy recently due to the immense volume and lack of upper management s

One Year

One year ago today I officially started my blog. I have posted 83 - now 84 - times. I have shared my innermost thoughts and feelings and some of you have been along for the journey. Thank you so much. I started this blog because I'd been - for lack of a better term - Facebook blogging for a couple of months. I was using Notes to share my day to day struggles with my friends. You all helped me through my darkest days. Your comments on my Notes and your private messages really

Self-Quarantine: Day huh? Round what?

I give up. I've lost count. I'm not even fully sure you can even call what I'm doing now as self-quarantine anymore. It's not quite back to pre-pandemic standards, but I am working on it. I'm still reluctant to give hugs. But I have given a few. Between consenting adults I guess it's ok now? Until I find out I have Covid and go into hiding for the rest of my life. I had to look it up. I haven't posted since May 21st! So much has happened, so get comfy. The Covid wedding we we

Self-Quarantine: Day 30, Round 3ish?

I've loosened up a little, just in the last week. I'm still being cautious, but I'm trying at least. I guess it started with Xander. I wouldn't let the boys come over for Mother's Day...which I did regret... but I let Xander come over after Mother's Day - so he could bring me flowers. We kept our distance and it was super hard saying goodbye and not giving him a hug but I'm working on it. Then Zach came over the next day to bring me dinner and my Mother's Day gift of Ocean Vo

Self-Quarantine: Day 19, Round 3*

*Although I have seen Rob during this time frame, neither of us have gone anywhere else during this time. Except a brief excursion to the post-office but more on that later. I should start with a quick Mother's Day acknowledgment - today being Mother's Day and all. It's sort of a sore point for me. To be clear, I embrace any gift getting or giving holiday - I enjoy both aspects of them. I enjoy being the focus of celebration, so again, good things. (I could try to be one of t

Self-Quarantine: Day 8, Round 3

I'm not going to sugar coat this. This is likely going to be a long, messy, angry, petty post. I'm not apologizing for it, just giving you fair warning. I woke up around 4:30ish this morning to pee. And for some completely inexplicable reason that I have not been able to work out, Lanie popped in my head. Not only that, but I almost had to get up and type out a post right then because I was already composing it in my head so much I had a hard time falling back asleep. I sort

Self-Quarantine: Day 5, Round 3

I caved in last weekend and let Rob come over. I made it 24 days on Round 2. It'd been a full 3 weeks - maybe longer - since either of us had been out of the house (except for neighborhood walks) so I felt chance of contamination was low. And I won't lie. It felt really, really good to be able to hug him. He stayed all weekend and got me out of the apartment for a few hours and oh my god I miss things. We went to the Pub to pick up some shirts Matt made. Not getting a Matt h

Self-Quarantine: Day 20, Round 2

I feel like these posts might start coming in greater frequency. Last week we had our monthly branch call. It's essentially where we all stop what we are doing for an hour so we can listen to how amazing the loan officers are (there's a little cheer for ops but Processing, Funding, and Underwriting get maybe 30 minutes total - the rest of the hour is just a pat on the back for sales). It's frustrating for a myriad of reasons. They always go through the top three and ask them

Self-Quarantine: Day 12, Round 2

#TriggerWarning Buckle up my friends. This post is inspired by a Facebook exchange on my sister's page. PS I'm sorry for hijacking your post CeCe. It started innocently enough. My sister posted her plans for the day. My mom joins the conversation and says she went to the store for toilet paper. CeCe cautions her to be careful and to wash her hands. Mom responds with "I got a big hug from a man whole (sic) at the store." CeCe responds "why?!" Which is a natural response given

Self-Quarantine Diary - Day 8, Round 2

So how is your quarantine going? I feel like I spend even more time on Facebook now than usual. I can’t help but constantly refresh my feed. I don’t know what news source to follow anymore so I wait to see what friends post and then try to vet what sounds real. Which is a challenge since everything that has happened since November 2016 is surreal. Speaking of, Tiger King is surreal. Man – that docuseries has certainly taken the world by storm, hasn’t it? It feels like everyon

Self-Quarantine Diary: Day Twelve?

Or do I have to start the count all over because I went to the hospital? Remember in my last post how I said it was semi-determined that I possibly maybe had a kidney issue? It's been determined. Everything was going fine. I'd had minor pain over the weekend - nothing a couple Excedrine Migraine (that's my go to pain killer even if it isn't a headache) couldn't fix. I even had a relaxing that I didn't work. I only had one file to do when I clocked out on Friday s

Self-Quarantine Diary: Day Five

I haven't left my apartment since Monday when I went out to get trash bags on my lunch break. I haven't seen or spoken to a live person face to face in 5 days. It isn't much different from where I was exactly a year ago to be honest. The main difference is I had Spike with me last year. We were in it together...even if that was only because I had him trapped in the apartment with me. It's a little different now. My back hurt a couple of days ago. Like scary hurt. Like I could

Are you ready?

Self-quarantine, huh? Sounds like just another day that ends in Y for me. Pretty much anyway. I can't say I've never been so happy to work from home (see all of 2019) but this is definitely another notch in the reasons to work from home category. The downside of working from home is when you do feel under the weather it can be hard to take the day off. It's not impossible, just always feels a little weird. But yeah, I got this self-quarantine thing down. Easy peasy. I'll admi

How are you?

No, I mean it. How are YOU? A few years ago I decided that when someone popped into my mind, I would make an effort to reach out to them. Because maybe that person needed to hear from me. Maybe I need to hear from them. So if I randomly reach out to you via text or instant messenger or Facebook post or even this blog, I want you to know it is because I am thinking of you and I sincerely hope all is well. And if it isn’t, you can tell me. Last week my Uncle Jody randomly poppe

Dominican Republic Getaway - Day Five

Ok - one last post about our trip. Even though we had previously pre-paid for transportation to the airport from our original "resort", I was unable to get anyone on the phone to assist in scheduling a new pick up location. They kept telling me I had to make changes through my travel agent. Even though I said I wanted to pay the difference. And even though the travel agent was only available from 9-5 Monday - Friday. Don't worry. I'm leaving scathing reviews everywhere I can

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