Does anyone else have a hard time writing the date when it is your birthday?
What I mean is, am I the only one that wants to write out my birth year instead of the current year?
Tell me it isn't just me.
Today is my birthday. I did not see my life making this turn this time last year.
Not to beat a dead horse (also WTF is that a saying?), this year has been a lot. Not all of it good. Not all of it bad either.
A couple of years ago I woke up on my birthday and the first thing I did was take a selfie. I'm not sure why. Or what compelled me to do it. But looking back on my Facebook memories, I'm glad I did. So it is sort of a tradition now.
And this is what 49 looks like. I feel like I aged a lot this year. I mean, you've read my blog. This has been the kind of year that ages a person. It took a toll on my soul. That might sound overly dramatic but it doesn't diminish the truth of it.
Xander came over with his girlfriend yesterday to bake my birthday cake (because I have all the necessary supplies) and she asked him what I do to my skin so that I don't have wrinkles. He wasn't sure he should tell her my answer, "be fat".
Its true though! I mean yes, I use moisturizer and sunscreen daily but that wasn't always the case. And I LOVE the sun. I really think the wrinkles are all there, just less visible because of the "fillers".
That's all fat is anyway, right? Fillers?
I mean...after all, I filled up and got fat. ba dum dum
LOL I slay me.
At Rob's birthday party, while standing in line for the bathroom, I was talking to some new friends and they asked me who the party was for. I said it was my boyfriend's 50th and there were some comments that led me to believe they thought I was much younger than that. So I had to tell them I would be 49 in a week...collective shock all around me. When they were joined by a male friend a few moments later, one of the girls asked him how old he thought I was, his answer was 29.
To be clear, I don't think a sober person in the light of day would mistake me for a 29 year old.
Maybe 39...maybe. If I'm wearing make up and trying hard. And the sun is in their eyes.
But I do love and appreciate the lighting in the hall to the bathroom at the Pub and the inebriated patrons with the momentary ego boost.
NOT that I mind being 49.
Life is a roller coaster. It's full of ups and downs. I've been riding up for a long, long time. If anyone needs proof I'll be happy to show you my Facebook memory feed for today with post after post of me expressing gratitude for everything in my life. Especially my friends.
But I guess when you go that high on the roller coaster, the way down is long and scary. Terrifying even. If you are very lucky, you are riding that roller coaster with great friends. Friends that will hold your hand and scream with you and help you get back up when you feel like you can't move your legs anymore.
And I am very lucky.
Not only did I have an amazing base of friends that have supported me this year, but I have a whole new group of friends that I have added this year. How cool is that?
I mean at some point you kind of think to yourself maybe you are full up on friends.
Or maybe there is room for a couple more. But not too many.
And then suddenly you have a whole new group that just adds to and enriches your life in ways you never thought about.
Anyway, I'm lucky. Yeah it's different than it was before, but at it's core I was lucky because of my wonderful friends so not that much has changed really.
Except I have more friends so I am even luckier.