Wedding Wednesday - Dress Drama
*Disclaimer* In case you couldn't tell, this is a wedding centric post. If you are not interested, please move along and I will see you next time. <3
As the title of this post suggests, we've had a little crisis this last week.
I purchased my wedding dress back in September. And when I say purchased I mean I ordered and paid for my dress. The anticipated delivery date given was January 17th. And obviously with my wedding not being until September, that still left plenty of time to get it altered.
But some time in January, before my due date, I was notified there was a slight delay and my new due date was February 11th. Ok - no big deal. It's a few extra weeks but there is still plenty of time for alterations. I did follow up with a phone call and asked why the delay but was told everything was fine, just issues with shipping.
Then a couple of days later I received notification that my NEW due date was March 28th.
Ok. Starting to get nervous but that still leaves plenty of time for alterations. It'll be fine.
But is it though? I mean I can't really afford many more delays before it becomes a problem. And if for some reason they can't get it until June or July or NOT AT ALL, then what?
And we've already had issues with the suits for the guys so I am already on edge (more on that later). But the more I thought about it, the more concerned I got.
So last Monday I called and asked for an update. I just need to know my dress is really coming. I can continue to be patient, but I need to know it is on it's way. For real.
It took a few days but finally on Thursday I got the call I was dreading. Not only is my dress not ready but they can no longer in confidence provide a new due date as it hasn't even been made yet. When asked what my options were, it was suggested I get a refund. And when David's Bridal suggests you get a refund, you know it is bleak.
So for starters, I ordered and paid for my dress 6 months ago and if I had continued to be patient I would have lost another month only to find out I had no dress.
Back when I originally ordered my dress, I was told it would take 4 months. After all, I was ordering not quite a custom color but definitely not a standard one. But also 4 months is just usually what it takes.
Now I'm not mathy but if it takes on average 4 months to get a dress and 2 months for alterations and my wedding is in 6 months, that is a bit too close for comfort for me. I know things can come in faster and rushes can be placed but do you really want to rush someone working on your wedding dress?
I will say I was more concerned/put out by the inconvenience of this than I wasn't getting my dress. Although I was very pleased with it and I did love the color, I know there are plenty of other dresses to choose from.
I'm just glad I hadn't purchased any accessories yet.
There's also the factor of my dress sort of being the centerpiece around which the entire rest of the wedding was planned. I was really excited that although it was very traditionally bridal, it was going to have an unexpected element. And now that is gone. So that was disappointing.
Plus we already have the bridesmaids dresses which were purchased with a specific gown in mind so what happens if they don't work as well with the new dress?
* for the record, I did ask and was told they would be able to exchange their dresses but no refunds since it had been more than 7 days.
And yes, I did almost go off on that because how is it their fault that the dresses were ok when they picked them up but maybe not now? But I figured I would fight that fight if it came down to it.
Anyway, I spent all day Friday reviewing the inventory of every website and bridal shop I could think of. Yes I checked all the used dresses - none of them had my dress. I tried making appointments but most were at least 3 weeks out!
There were suggestions that I buy one in white and dye it but that just felt too risky. What if it didn't come out how I wanted? Then I am stuck because I can't return it. Also Susie looked up what it would cost to have it professionally dyed and it was more than I had paid for the dress (I am well aware that was one shop and obviously I would have done comparison shopping but again, probably not something you want to go cheap on, right?).
One person in a Facebook group I am in offered to make it for me - yeah, that's not risky. And another claimed to have found my dress in my size for a lower price than I originally paid. Which seemed too good to be true and she couldn't provide any evidence to make me feel safer. So, no thank you.
At some point I gave up looking for the color and just looked for shops that would carry my size.
Then Magan reminded me of a shop we had been to before - she remembered it more favorably than I did and I was able to get an appointment for Saturday afternoon so I figured it was worth a shot.
Once there I was told I would have to buy off the rack because even express orders they were placing that day weren't due until October.
Fuck. That will seriously limit my choices.
And as suspected, due to the limited selections available in my size, I also had to double my budget. I had mentally prepared myself for it but didn't want to.
I tried on probably a dozen dresses but one did stand out. And it was quite literally the one thing I said I didn't want. But it had other redeeming factors - none of which I can go into detail here because Rob reads this and I'm trying to keep it a secret.
Long story longer, I have a new dress and it is in my possession so no more concerns about delays. It wasn't what I originally envisioned but I actually like it a lot. And it still works with the bridesmaids dresses. So all's well that ends well. Some day I will share a pic of what I was supposed to have just so you all can see it. It really would have been stunning.
So the lesson here once again is, it's ok to have a vision of what you want, as long as you are also open minded. Trust the stylist. Trust your gut. But be flexible.
Remember I mentioned there were issues with the men's suits?
We had previously decided to order custom shirts and vests and rent suits for the men. So we went back in September to Men's Wearhouse and ordered the vests and shirts for Zach and Duncan (and a full suit for Rob). We ordered the suits for the boys and told Xander our order number and go into one in San Antonio to get fitted/place his order.
So one Saturday he goes in except they can't find our order number and have no idea what it is he is supposed to get.
Ugh. Fine - we will just handle it the next time you are up here (which we did).
At some point the vests come in plus the custom shirts for Zach, Duncan, and Rob. Except Duncan's shirt had Rob's initials on it. So that had to be re-ordered.
Eventually Rob goes in with his other groomsman and they order his shirt, vest, and suit.
Though evidently they put it on a different order number.
A couple of weeks ago Rob gets an email saying your order is ready. So we go to pick it up. Except they don't have anything for him. And not only that but they are now saying Mark didn't pre-pay and so they didn't actually order anything for him.
And not only that but the material for the vests is discontinued.
At this point I am waiting in the car because it was supposed to be a quick in and out. So Rob called me to fill me in.
This is where my bridezilla starts to peek out.
I told him to get the receipt from Mark (this is how we found out they put it on a different order number and why they thought it hadn't been paid for). I then told him that if they could not get Mark's vest then we were returning everything and getting our money back.
All custom orders included.
See the vests are made from the same material as Rob's suit. So if we can't get that material anymore, they won't match, so what's the point? We are still missing 3 shirts but that's less of a big deal.
Eventually they get his info and say they will talk to the manager and call him the next day with a game plan.
When we get home we check and it turns out we actually have all the vests. And in case you are wondering what kind of a man he is, as soon as he realized we had all the vests he called and apologized. We are still missing 3 shirts, but we are good on the vests at least.
But the more I thought about it, the more concerned I became. What happens if they don't have the suits in New Hampshire for the wedding. Then what? At this point I have lost all faith in their ability to have a complete and correct order for us.
Which made me start to spiral about my dress - which turned out to be a good thing. But I think we are going to go and buy the boys some suits instead of renting them. And I'm sorry but Mark will have to buy one too - honestly he can probably buy for the same or less than we were renting. And the boys could all use a nice suit in their wardrobes anyway.
So on Thursday we are taking Duncan and Zach suit shopping. Wish us luck!
And a quick final note, the invitations came in today! I'm very excited about them. I recently bought a book on hand lettering and we shall see if I can learn in time to address them. It's not that I don't have nice handwriting, I just want to take it up a notch. Stay tuned on that.
#stilllucky #infinitelybetter #weddingwednesday #marriedafter40 #marriedafter50 #secondtimearound #thirdtimesthecharm #maturebride #maturegroom #menswearhouse #davidsbridal