*Disclaimer* In case you couldn't tell, this is a wedding centric post. If you are not interested, please move along and I will see you next time. <3
Just thought I would share a fun little story with you today. You may remember a post from a couple of weeks ago in which I discussed my dress drama.
tl:dr - David's Bridal cancelled my dress because it was on indefinite back order. I was fully refunded my money.
So I bought a new dress. And I was fine with it. It's not AT ALL what I envisioned but it is very pretty and I have it so that's that.
Except I'd be lying if I didn't tell you that I keep thinking about my original dress. And how I was really excited about the color of it. It was literally the centerpiece around which the entire rest of the wedding was designed.
It's been hard because I have spent the last 6 months picturing my wedding day a certain way and while it might be overly dramatic to say it's all changed, it kind of has.
My original dress was very simple, the color being the bit that made it stand out. The new dress is much more of a statement. Again, I can't go into details here because Rob will read this. But suffice to say it isn't simple. It still works and I know it will be lovely, it's just different.
It's hard to change your mindset - but I know I will get there. I'm willing to say that by September I mayeven think "ugh can you believe I almost got married wearing that?!"
Now for the fun part: David's Bridal called me yesterday to let me know my dress came in if I still want it.
For fucks sake. Are you kidding me?
I immediately called the other shop where I bought my replacement dress 2 weeks ago but all sales are final - which I knew - but I was hoping I could plead extenuating circumstances.
I briefly considered getting it and wearing one for the ceremony and one for the reception. Except the replacement dress already cost twice the original and I may be frivolous at times but I'm still pretty frugal. And I cannot bring myself to pay for 2 dresses plus alterations on each.
It has also been suggested that I go and get the original and try to sell the replacement. But I am so afraid I wouldn't be able to sell the replacement - or I'd have to take a loss on it - so I don't think that's the answer.
I haven't called David's Bridal back yet - I know I should. I'm just going to sit on it a few more minutes while I resist the urge to go try it on just to see if I love it as much as I thought I would. There's always a chance I would actually hate it and then be glad I got the replacement.
What would you do?
I've had a few other hiccups involving the overall decor.
I've lost count of how many times I've adjusted my vision. Which is totally fine. Sometimes we picture our wedding a certain way and then reality sets in and you realize you can't do it (usually because of money - at least in my case).
My original vision was the naked farm table with greenery (and a few blooms here and there) and assorted candles down the center - set up as kings tables. Well those lovely tables are considerably more than a banquet table - even if you add a tablecloth (and you have to use a tablecloth with a banquet table).
So that was my first concession. But if I was going to do it, I wanted velvet tablecloths and MCM china. No problem, still less than the naked table with MCM china.
But then the caterer adds a plating fee for the china and that added up real fast. But I can use their eco friendly palm leaf plates for no additional fee.
Fine. I will change my mind about the plates but I don't want a glorified paper plate on velvet, let's go with the naked table look again. So this is concession #2 - design #3 for those following along.
By not using the velvet table cloths and china we are saving on those costs and the plating fee and it is now cheaper to do the naked tables. I'm not in love with the plates but I concede that they are definitely the correct option.
So design #4 is naked table with greenery and candles with the disposable plates.
Except greenery is in high demand and low supply so that cost is now $500 per table (and we have at least 8 tables) and I don't know about you but I'm not spending $4000 for a bunch of leaves. That will be thrown away at the end of the night.
And now we are on design #5 - replacing the greenery with velvet table runners, keeping the candles but not supplementing with flowers. I sourced some velvet table runners - ordered samples and love them - for less than $4 each.
Just saying, $16 is a lot more affordable than $4000.
Except I couldn't decide on the color. Because of course. I had it narrowed down to two choices of the limited options but I could NOT make up my mind. I know I was driving Susie and Magan nuts about it yesterday.
I was driving me nuts.
So I went online and found another color option (this time in green which makes it an even better substitute for the missing greenery) in the velvet table runner but it is from another source and is $11 per table to buy. Which is still considerably less than $4000. I can also just rent them from the company that is providing everything else for $12.50 per table and although I like saving money whenever I can, I think this instance it is worth spending an extra $12 to rent them and not have to worry about anything else.
And that's where I land today. I do feel pretty confident this is the best and most economical choice that gets me close to my original vision anyway. It's a bit more DIY than I might have preferred but luckily I already booked a fantastic day of coordinating team to handle all that.
In other news, I have also decided on and purchased my wedding jewelry. I was reluctant to pull that trigger until I had my dress though the funny part is what I have purchased would work with either one.
I have an antique costume jewelry choker that once belonged to my grandmother. It has very little value - honestly not even much sentimental value as I have no recollection of my grandmother wearing it. I wore it as a headband for my previous walk down the aisle and Jana actually wore it in her hair for prom when she lived with us. And I think I wore it as a necklace to my 10 year high school reunion - or some other "fancy dress" type occasions. The point is, I don't wear it much. And never as a necklace because (a) it was too small for me anymore and (b) I did remove the clasp when I converted it to a headband.
But it is still very pretty. I knew I wanted to wear a bracelet on my wedding day and thought maybe this could be the next incarnation of this necklace. I'll have to find a jeweler to convert it but I was pretty excited about that decision. Even though it seems I have lost two of the "stones" I figured it wasn't overly noticeable and besides it's my something old and something blue.
But what could I wear to coordinate with it? I don't feel like I need a necklace but I definitely need earrings. So I decided on a whim this morning to search Etsy for Sarah Coventry jewelry blue.
Because that's the limit of what I know about it.
And guess what! I found the full set, necklace, clip on earrings, and a brooch! The necklace is still too small but I'm hoping to make it into a bracelet too - and I can use the unused stones to replace the missing ones from the one I have. And I'll have the earrings converted to post earrings most likely as clip ons are not usually comfortable enough to wear all night. And the brooch can be used in my hair!
Like I said, these pieces are costume jewelry and although the set is from 1958 and is definitely considered an antique, I don't believe I'm devaluing anything as I am making them more wearable for me. Plus based on the pricing I saw on Etsy - and that I found more than one of each piece, it isn't valuable.
Hell, I may even keep the stones missing from Grandma's necklace just so I can always remember which one was her's.
So if you are reading this and are planning your upcoming nuptials, just remember to go with the flow. Things happen and sometimes we have to adjust our visions.
And maybe, things work out better in the end.
#stilllucky#infinitelybetter #marriedafter40 #marriedafter50 #maturebride #maturegroom #secondtimearound #thirdtimesthecharm #davidsbridal #sarahcoventry #changeofplans